Why does Violence happen and HOW do we change it?

P1070205I’m a mummy and my heart breaks.

I am saddened that other mummy’s and daddy’s and grandparents and brothers and sisters are hurting.

I dearly want to fix it for everyone.

Why do we lash out? We need to personalise the question… why are people dying all over the world in violence?

Do truly happy and aware people cause pain to others?

I think the answer to the last question is a resounding NO so the next question might be,

Why are we all searching for happiness so desperately? All the happiness and love quotes in social media are indicative of a kind of desperation a lacking of our inner contentment and happiness.


How do we bring happiness and awareness to MORE of us… HOW do we get happiness and awareness to evolve into a natural expectation for one’s life?

Somewhere in the busy ness and stimulation of our journey as a planet we have created a state of mind that doesn’t include happiness as a priority, and a direct result of this neglect is frustration/mental confusion and violence.

So simply, it is time to re-prioritise.

First step RENEGOTIATE our school curriculum to prioritise EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

Which is the ability to identify, use, understand, and manage your emotions in positive and constructive ways.


It is about switching on or bringing synergy to both
hemispheres of the brain for clarity of mind and solution orientated thinking!


Emotional Intelligence is about recognizing your own emotional state, the emotional states of others and communicating with empathy and compassion.


Incorporating Emotional Intelligence Education into your home, classroom or community is


          E~ empathy, expression, excellence


          A~ awareness, acceptance, appreciation


          S~ self-esteem, success, sustainability


          Y~ your world, your tomorrow

SERIOUSLY it is time to consciously and actively direct the growth of our youth to reduce outbreaks of violent frustration such as the Newton tragedy and other horrendous moments in our life on Earth.





Food Choices for a Happier Christmas

IMG_0124In all my years as a parent the best festive days with children are those that start with fruit instead of chocolate!!


When I was a younger mum, I was very  innocent and well ignorant  actually about nutrition and the effect different foods and the chemicals in them they could have on my children.

As I have matured I realise that these babies come in so pure, their little tastebuds are fresh, fruit is SO sweet, spices are so spicy.

When a preservative or flavour hits their body for the first time it’s like a bomb going off.

I am so glad I worked some of this out before these last babies came into my life, it has made our days much easier!

Food consciousness is such an important part of parenting, not that we withhold treats, sugar or whatever we are just more aware of the timing for handing them out and in manageable quantities.

I think completely withholding the treats of this world from kids can also have a negative affect… but once again it is more about the attitude than the action.

Oh parenting…. we are in a very powerful position that seems to come with a lot of responsibility….having said that it also comes equipped with the solutions, if we can slow down and breathe deeply enough to allow them to surface.


SO even though Christmas is FUN it is also highly energetic with different people/different dynamics, sugar highs and lows, fatigue from excitement, preparing food and gifts till late, and getting up before dawn!

We CAN make it a less stressful day and put out fruit, fruit juice and water in the morning, play calming or classical music if possible, encourage kids to stop every now and then during the day…. maybe even slow the pace of gift giving and give the time to truly appreciate the moment….

SUCH fun!


World Peace- It Starts with ONE and Ends With ONE

IMG_0478We all want a peaceful life whether we believe it is possible or not.

And we know we are happier when we are smiling and calm and when we feel free to be ourselves.

So as parents we need to find ways to teach children to recognise and acknowledge their emotions and to be who they feel they really are not just who we might like them to be. We need to encourage  self-expression within healthy boundaries and encourage our children to SMILE a LOT!

World Peace IS possible but we can’t look outside ourselves we really have to start within our own heart.

HERE in our home and family unit sits the ticket to peace on Earth.

Wherever there is a child there is an opportunity to affect our future in a positive and sustainable way!.

BE Peace today!

I AM the Boss of My Body Part TWO

IMG_0744In the second part of the workshop we are going to make up a feelings DANCE!
Instruct the children of the emotion they will be performing before you start the music.
Start with ‘we are now choosing to do a MAD Dance!’
Start the music- Everyone stomps around dancing and moving in a BIG ANGRY MAD WAY!!!

Really get into it. Say things like ‘OOOH, I FEEL SO MAD! Stomp stomp stomp!’ After a few minutes turn of the music and let everyone simmer down.
Take a few deep breaths and prepare for your SAD DANCE!
Follow with SCARED DANCE

And finally lets do a GLAD dance.
Allow the glad dance to go a little longer than the previous dances.
When the dances are over, discuss the feelings in the body.
Which feelings are the LOUDEST, BIGGEST, SMALLEST, SOFTEST?’ What feelings did the children enjoy dancing to the most?

Suggestion: If the children are older and motivated you can create a MAD SAD SCARED GLAD dance performance for the younger children in the school. Teaching what we learn about ourselves helps to lock into place the benefits, giving us a sense of purpose.

Free for YOU – I AM A Big Kid Now

SONY DSCI am giving away my illustrated children’s story ‘I AM A BIG Kid Now’ to any interested parent or educator.

This little story is about Bella and her Mum finding ways to deal with the emotions that are associated with Bella starting big school.

Feelings can be so strong and sometimes seem stronger than us but ultimately we are MUCH stronger than our feelings and CAN gain command of them with focus and positivity.

Hopefully my story can help families develop the emotional intelligence necessary to recognise, acknowledge and change difficult feelings into good feelings.

If you would like a copy please contact me arna@theiamprogram.com and I will send the PDF to your inbox

lots of LOVE



I AM The Boss of My Body Part One


P1060607It is important to teach kids that they have command of certain aspects of life.

A way to do this is through the body.

Learning that we can create movement and making the connection between thought and action plants the seed for ‘a thought = action’ potential in other areas of our lives.


In the below workshop we play with the idea of choice and movement.

By using the word ‘choice’ and ‘choose’ repetitively we plant the idea of command. Once a human feels the feeling of command it is easier to practice and to grow.

With a feeling concept of personal command we develop our emotional intelligence and naturally begin to respond more appropriately throughout our life.

In this workshop we will also also play with feeling detection and body awareness in order to bring the person back into their bodies even when negative experiences may have caused them to detach from their body early.


Everyday we move our body in different ways.
Discuss movement with questions like ‘Can anyone think of things that we do with our body?’
We walk, bend over, jump, hop, reach for things etc Life is like a dance we are doing all the time!
With enthusiastic teacher participation we are going to explore the way we choose to move our body.

Play with yoga poses. (see Pics)

Have lots of fun, be noisy and encourage breathing.
Encourage the FEELING of being a butterfly for example

P1060598 Ask questions throughout the practice like ‘Can you feel the feeling of being a powerful eagle?’
Instruct each pose with a sentence like, ‘now we CHOOSE to flap our legs like butterfly wings….

Even if it feels a little strange to use the word ‘choice’ it is an effective strategy to implant the concept that even our movements are choices we are constantly making!

Becoming conscious of our body command is a powerful step in regaining our autonomy!

Kids LOVE Animals

Our Puppy dog Rosa is in hospital!

A little tiny tick wriggled in and latched on to her fluffy yellow neck.

My kids were horrified, I was horrified too, not only at the state of Rosa but at the vet’s BILL!

When I told the children that Rosa was sick and we’d have to tighten our belts this Christmas,

every one of my children came at me with fistfuls of cash!

My 16 yr old said he’d give me his wages from the Pizza shop, my 13 yr old said she’d babysit for free the rest of the year,

my 23 yr old twins, tried to give me $200 INSTEAD OF PAYING THEIR ELECTRICITY BILL!

Three yr old Amora gave me her Dora purse (it was empty but hey it’s the thought that counts!).

They said they didn’t want Christmas presents, just Rosa.

(I’d already done the Chrissy shopping…. PHEWWWW!)

Which led me to thinking about our connection to our pets and the way they help us develop

our emotional intelligence and expand our loving hearts!

Animals are a natural source of joy and connection for humans.

We project our emotions easily upon them and we receive comfort from their presence,

I think we LEARN a lot about loving each other when we are allowed to

explore love and connection with animals.

Children are fascinated by animals; their sounds, their actions and the way they look.

Where there are animals there is imagination and potential friendship.

In the below workshop we use the animals to establish a bridge between

the conscious world of nature and our unconscious need to express ourselves.

As children explore their imagination through the concept of connection and creation,

they begin to see that their emotional world is actually at their command

Workshop Idea

Engage in a discussion about animals.

How many animals can we think of?

What are the children’s favourite animals? What strange things do animals do?

What does their favourite animal eat? What noises do animals make?

Can we make animal noises?

Everyone take turns making an animal noise. Can we guess which animal these noises come from? Make it a happy noisy game!

Discuss people noises.
People are lucky, we can make animal noises and people noises!
What can people do that animals cannot?
People laugh, cry, sing, talk, yell, dance…do any animals do these things…which ones?

Does anyone know an animal that can make laughing sounds? Kookaburra’s in Australia laugh!
Hyena’s make a laughing sound!
What makes us laugh?

Give the children time to brainstorm happiness.

Laughter can be generated in a number of ways.

Start a laughing session.

Pretend to giggle, pull a silly face, laugh a little louder, make a funny movement. Pull a straight face, followed by a smile, straight face, smiling face, grumpy face, big grin!

Work the kids into a laughing party!

Put on some Music and pretend to BE your favourite animal to music!

Grab some paints and paper and MAKE UP an animal! Make up the name of the animal, the sound it makes, decide what sort of environment it lives in and what it eats!

Let the imagination be FREE!

Have FUN!!